With the recent report of Adrian Peterson being indicted for child abuse, and the even more recent news of him possibly ?abusing another child, the United States erupted in debate over whether Peterson was in fact an abuser, or just a parent who just disciplined his children.
I support the notion that Peterson has abused at least one of his children, and maybe another. Somewhat bittersweet nostalgia was discussed among people who were hit when they were younger, with hands, switches (as was used in the case Peterson has been indicted for), electrical cords, wooden spoons, and more. I am one of these people and I must say, I do not remember getting physically disciplined at the young age of four. While I personally do not support hitting children at all, I would not indict someone over spanking or a simple hit to the buttocks, for example. However, it is critical that we are reminded of how?much more extreme?these situations involving the star running back are than the simple discipline to which many people have been referring.
I will not discuss the newest allegation against Mr. Peterson because not as many details and physical evidence has been made public, but the abuse he levied against his 4 year old and subsequently indicted for, is enough to tell me that Adrian has a problem.
TMZ released photos of the boy’s injuries which included thigh, hands, lower back and buttocks.??The cuts were not small nor superficial, but rather open wounds, or lacerations. ?The boy also is reported to have told authorities that Peterson made him pull down his pants, and while he hit him he actually got him in the scrotum. ?There are also claims from the boy that his dad put the leaves from the branch in his mouth. ?This incident does not even seem like an act gone too far; it seems like a physical ordeal turned into one of pure humiliation. If people do not believe this to be abuse, this helps explain while we have the many societal problems that we do today.
Let’s think about it. If Peterson were to put lacerations?on his wife, or teammate, in any part of their body but especially the private area region, he would be seen as having assaulted them. Assault?is a legal and criminal term and a serious one. However, when one does this to an innocent four year old, it is okay? We constantly preach how loving and wonderful children are because they are so innocent, but when it comes to “discipline” a four year old is?so?out of line that he/she deserves lacerations? This is a ludicrous idea.
Let’s also acknowledge that just because our parents or grandparents hit us, that does not make it okay. Most of this talk has been coming from the black community, at least from what I have witnessed on social media networks like Facebook and Twitter. Now, as minorities, do I really need to delve into how we as people,??can and have been wrong before?
Regardless of how much we may proclaim that hitting is wrong from a sentimental standpoint, people will still support Peterson’s harsh actions?toward his kid. However, what if people have actually studied the complicated arena of parenting and child psychology? Oh wait, we have.
The American Psychological Association, one of the most prestigious academic institutions in the entire world, has come out against physical ways of disciplining children. Dr. Sandra Graham-Bermann, a psychology professor?and investigator, says that the research is showing that this kind of discipline leads to very negative effects on children. She believes that people hit their kids out of frustration and do not see other options. Another esteemed professor, Dr. Alan Kazdin from Yale University, does not believe spanking works either. He says,
“There is no need for corporal punishment based on the research. We are not giving up an effective technique. We are saying this is a horrible thing that does not work.”
So what is the evidence? Apparently so much of it exist that the United Nations Committee on the Rights of the Child created a directive in 2006 calling physical forms of punishment “legalized violence” and “should be eliminated.” 192 countries ratified this document. I wonder who the two that didn’t were? The answer is the United States and Somalia. The United States pretends to be a beacon of moral greatness and human rights advancements, yet we are on the same moral playing field as Somalia when it comes to this issue.
Dr. Elizabeth Gershoff is a leading researcher on physical punishment at the University of Texas in Austin. She says that this type of punishment from parents can be so dangerous because it does not work in getting kids to comply. Instead of trying other methods though, adults feel that they have to escalate the physical punishment and this escalation is what can lead to danger. This is a great point to me. ?If hitting?children was a magic hit, one hit would be the charm. However, even in my personal experience, this is not the case. Parents keep going and keep going until either they or the child just gets tired and gives up. This doesn’t seem like the most rational and effective way of instilling values, which is supposed to be the whole point of parenting and discipline.
Dr. Graham-Bermann discusses probably the most vital part of helping us understand why physical punishment does not work. She states:
“Physical punishment can work momentarily to stop problematic behavior because children are afraid of being hit, but it doesn’t work in the long term and can make children more aggressive.”
This is what I have been preaching!!! If the goal of parenting it to shut kids is to shut them up until they comply, then yes, hit. But, if the goal is to actually teach our children important morals and how to act in a civilized society, this method is not doing the job. Psychologists have been discussing the dangerous “cycle of violence” for decades. That is, people that got hit, hit others. This can lead to more extreme situations that help create domestic abuse perpetrators, and even killers.
There are problems with this research, particularly the correlative relationships between findings instead of a causation one. However, sometimes we can use our common sense where scholarly studies may fail. Do we really think that our society needs?more?violence? If you are like me, you think our society is tragically desensitized to violence. The abundance of it in our television shows, song lyrics, movies, as well as real world cases of domestic violence, child abuse, rape culture, gun deaths, gangs, etc, has often made us not even blink twice when hearing about violence in the news. I do not believe that what our children need is more violence in their lives, in any manner and regardless of who is the one [the parent] providing it to them.
Another important part of the puzzle here, is depression. Our children grow up to be teens and adults who are internally at war. Now I am not saying that spanking makes kids suicidal, but everything is connected. In our growing world where opportunities seem endless but competition is immense, and?perfection?is seemingly unattainable but continuously sought after via new-age discoveries like the “selfie,” our society has so much we can be down about. When a person is already down and strangled by pressure, something like physical punishment may be just another negative facet of their life that can lead to serious emotional issues.
Basically, what the world needs is more love and less violence. While a simple spanking probably isn’t going to cause that much damage, the abuse by Adrian Peterson is never something to be tolerated. Even if we disagree with psychological research and hold true to our Biblical beliefs of “spare the rod, spoil the child” we should all be able to agree that putting open numerous open wounds on a four year old, is wrong. The fact the we do not all agree on this, is troublesome.
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