JUST IN: Sean Spicer Has Resigned Because Trump Hired ‘The Mooch’

Beleaguered and (justifiably) ridiculed White House Press Secretary Sean Spicer has resigned in objection to Pres. Donald Trump’s hiring of new Communications Director Anthony Scaramucci, a post left open since being vacated by Michael Dubke in May. Spicer had only been in office for 182 days.

How bad does someone have to be for Sean Spicer to disapprove of him? This is how bad: paid douche-canoe and Chief of Staff Reince Priebus can’t stand him either, even though he’s now publicly saying he supports Scaramucci “100 percent.”

Expect delicious White House drama to ensue immediately.

via WaPo:

Scaramucci has coined a particularly crude nickname for Priebus, and Priebus previously blocked the financier from several other top White House roles. 

via/via

Reportedly, Scaramucci was hired because Trump “likes him on TV.” And yes, he is a bit of a hottie (sorry, but he is!) even though he’s a slimeball. At least we’ll get a little eye candy with our White House lies.

This video cites Scaramucci’s lack of experience as the primary impetus for Spicer’s resignation; Spicer reportedly feels he’d basically be doing two jobs for the price of one. To be fair, none of us wants Spicey doing two jobs; it’s bad enough watching him do one job. Watch:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pMhrfOTCPIQ

Another reason Scaramucci was likely hired: Trump’s kiddos like him.

via BuzzFeed:

Spicer made the move minutes after President Trump hired Anthony Scaramucci, the founder of a hedge fund, to be the administration’s new communications director. The New York Times first reported he was stepping down.

Spicer had been filling that role while also serving as press secretary, following the departure of Mike Dubke as communications director at the end of May.

We’ve been hearing rumors of Spicer’s pending resignation (or firing!) since May, but thus far the White House has (of course) shut down the rumors. Sarah Huckabee Sanders has been doing most of the off-camera press briefings; June 23rd was the last time Spicer did an on-camera briefing.

Fun fact: on July 16th, Scaramucci retweeted Trump foe and author Stephen King, who was BLOCKED on Twitter by Trump.

Scaramucci, whose dubious nickname is “The Mooch,” was a Jeb Bush and Scott Walker supporter who threw his weight behind Trump during the campaign. He’s also well-known for lying about the size of Trump’s…inauguration crowd.

“This was the largest audience to ever witness an inauguration, period, both in person and around the globe,” he said. “These attempts to lessen the enthusiasm of the inauguration are shameful and wrong.”

Watch:

 

One thing The Mooch (which is what we’ll call him from now on) tried to do that his boss refused to do: cleaned himself up before being hired by Trump. He has reportedly sold his stake in his hedge fund. Of course this loser is still going to be scandal-ridden and we can’t WAIT for this new storm to start.

Here’s a video of The Mooch calling Trump “a fixer” (hahaha):

Of course, Twitter has reacted appropriately to Spicer’s resignation.

Even professional Always Wrong Guy Bill Kristol — the guy who helped Sarah Palin become John McCain’s VP pick — has (sort of) defended Spicer:

https://twitter.com/KFILE/status/888434304086364160

https://twitter.com/imillhiser/status/888437112332333056

Here are Spicey’s most memorable moments.

I had a successful career actively working with at-risk youth, people struggling with poverty and unemployment, and disadvantaged and oppressed populations. In 2011, I made the decision to pursue my dreams and become a full-time writer. Connect with me on LinkedIn, Twitter, and Facebook.