Herman Cain Joins The Fox News Brain Trust (VIDEO)

In a move that shocks almost no one, former Republican presidential hopeful and Godfather’s Pizza CEO Herman Cain has officially become a contributor for the Fox News Channel and Fox Business Network.

Per an official (and completely astonishing in its absurdity) announcement, Cain will provide analysis and commentary across FNC’s daytime and primetime programming, as well as on FOX Business Network (FBN).

Fox News Executive Vice President Bill Shine said:

Cain’s impressive resume [?????] makes him a valuable addition to the Fox News and Fox Business lineup. As a political expert with business savvy, he brings an important voice to the nation’s debates.

Cain joins the ranks of formal political figures who can’t find work elsewhere an esteemed group of contributors that have included Sarah Palin (recently fired from Fox), pundit Dick Morris (also recently booted out)Karl Rove, far-left Ohio Representative Dennis Kucinich, and former Massachusetts Senator Scott Brown.

Cain himself couldn’t be happier. He tweeted:

Herman Cain Tweet


He elaborated on his his website, CainTV.com:

Awww, Shucky Ducky!

As many of you have already heard, I am now officially a Fox News Contributor. I am very excited about the opportunity to be another voice for intelligent thinkers on Fox and to stand up for the conservative ideals that I campaigned for and that you all believe in. The United States of America is truly a great country, one where everyone has the opportunity to achieve their dreams. This is an exciting step, especially since it is coupled with my new radio show, HITM, Job Creators Network, and CainTV. It is my goal to save the saveable, and this partnership with Fox will allow for a larger platform to do that.

We The People are coming.


Yes, he really said “Awww, Shucky Ducky!” I didn’t add that.

Since being disgraced with sex scandals in his failed presidential bid, Cain has been busy with his own radio show launched on election day that replaced longtime syndicated conservative radio host Neal Boortz.

Cain’s presidential campaign was so riddled with embarrassing and unbelievable faux pas that he actually cut back on his campaign appearances in an attempt to avoid more gaffes. Let’s take a nostalgic stroll down the Herman Cain Campaign Lane (with videos!):

OK, look. I could go on and on. But what it boils down to is this: I am hella excited about Herman Cain joining Fox News. We sat for HOURS, in utter fascination, watching him during the 2012 GOP primaries; we have watched his YouTube clips to exhaustion; my (now ex) boyfriend printed photos of him and chased me around the house saying in a creep voice “c’mere pretty lady, you want a job, right? hehehe.”

We’ve missed Herman Cain. He was a big part of our lives. He was, to me:

The. Most. Entertaining. Politician. EVER.

I’m delighted that he’s joining the Fox News circus. I absolutely can NOT wait.

For a detailed explanation of “The Artist Formerly Known as Herman Cain,” you can enjoy Rachel Maddow’s brilliant analysis of the Herman Cain Campaign.

Here’s the video:


I had a successful career actively working with at-risk youth, people struggling with poverty and unemployment, and disadvantaged and oppressed populations. In 2011, I made the decision to pursue my dreams and become a full-time writer. Connect with me on LinkedIn, Twitter, and Facebook.