Being happy. It’seems like such an easy thing to do. So why is it that so many of us find ourselves saying “I’m just not happy”?
The biggest reason people are unhappy is because they?feel “stuck” in a situation. Maybe they wish they had a significant other, or maybe they’re miserable at their?job.?Low self-esteem is another contributing factor to unhappiness.
Please note that this article is not aimed at individuals with clinical depression. For that, a psychiatrist and/or anti-depressants may be needed?to find peace and happiness. This post is geared toward those individuals who?just need a little help feeling happier overall.
Here are 13 steps?that will lead to a happier you in 2015:
1. Stop comparing yourself to others.
There’s always going to be someone who’s smarter, richer, and better looking than you; so what? If you constantly compare yourself to others, you’ll only drive yourself crazy and hurt your self-esteem. Be the best YOU can be and acknowledge your own positive attributes.
2. Don’t worry?so much about what people think.
Seriously, stop worrying so much about what everyone else thinks. It’s impossible to please everyone, so why bother? If someone questions your life choices, just remember that it’s your life and you have every right to make mistakes and (hopefully) learn from them. Only you know exactly what you need, so listen to your heart. And stop being so self-conscious. Sometimes we all feel like the whole world is watching us. Instead of being self-conscious, just remember that ?everyone else is?so worried about being judged?that they aren’t paying attention to the fact that you’didn’t have time to wash your hair this morning.
3.?Stop worrying so much in general.
Worrying gets you nowhere. Take the energy you put towards worrying and focus it instead on living day-by-day. Enjoy the simple things in life and come to terms with the fact that some things are just out of your control.
4. Focus on the good.
It’s hard to be happy when you spend so much time focusing on your problems. You will always face problems and negative situations throughout your life, so you have to learn now how to focus on the positive. This also applies to body image. Instead of hating your body for your?large thighs and unclear skin, learn to thank your body for all the hard work and strain it undergoes. If you think positively, you can lead a positive life and develop?a positive self-image.
5. Be thankful for what you have.
Thanksgiving is the one day a year we all gather with friends and family to count our blessings for everything we have. Instead of waiting for that one day to roll around, try to remind yourself daily of everything you have for which to be grateful. This also applies to people. Make sure your friends, family, and significant other know you appreciate them on a regular basis. When you realize that you are more blessed than a lot of people on this planet, you will realize the problems you’ve made into mountains are really just small hills.
6. Realize that you are in charge of your own life.
Remind yourself that you are in the front seat of your life. It is your responsibility to take the wheel;?no one else’s.?If you are miserable at your job or you feel stuck in a rut, you must remember that you have the power to make positive changes. You can certainly look for a new job, pack up and move to a new place, decide to try online dating, etc. 2015 is an empty book, and you have the pen.?Make sure that when the year is over, you have a story worth reading. At the very least, try and do everything in your power to make sure that you’re in a better place at the end of the year than you were when it started. If you’re not progressing and evolving as you go through life, there’s no point living.
7. Be happy with where you’re at in life.
If you’re like me, you’re always looking forward to the next stage of life. In high school, the epitome of being an adult was getting your drivers license. Then it was going to college. Once you were in college, you didn’t feel like a true adult until you could buy your own booze. In your early 20s, you were eager to get established at a job, and you got antsy when all your friends started getting married. If you’re always looking ahead to the next stage of your life, you’re never going to fully appreciate the one you’re in. So?take pleasure in your accomplishments and learn from your mistakes as you continue on life’s journey.
8. Say goodbye to negative people.
There’s no quicker way to bring your spirits down than to surround yourself with negative people. If you’re friends with a negative Nancy, try to limit the time you spend with them. If you?think you have?a fake friend, it’s also time to say goodbye. ?A person is a fake friend if a) they are only nice to your face but talk about you behind your back b) only come around when they need something or there’s nothing better to do c) they bring unneeded stress and drama into your life or pressure you to do things.?If you can think of a so-called friend who fits any of the categories above, I’m sorry to tell you that you’re involved in a toxic friendship. Do yourself a favor and create as much distance as possible from this person. Friends are meant to enrich our lives, not make us feel bad about ourselves.
9. Spend some time alone.
Learning to like your own company is great for developing a healthy relationship with yourself. Spending time alone is?also a wonderful way to de-stress and re-energize. If you’re constantly spending time with someone else, such as a significant other, your personal growth?will suffer. Take time to be by yourself; read a book, take a relaxing bubble bath, unplug from your technological devices.?This will help you find a few minutes of inner peace a day.
10. Learn to put yourself first.
Putting yourself first is not always selfish. Learning to say no is essential to remaining happy and sane. Don’t feel bad if you tell someone you’re not able to do something; you have to be aware of your own limits and needs. Putting yourself first is about respecting yourself and not letting others walk all over you. When you respect yourself,?others will do the same.
11. Volunteer your time to helping others.
Helping others is an instant feel-good reward. Knowing that you have made a difference in someone else’s life is very rewarding, and working with people who are less fortunate is a great reminder to be grateful for all you have. If you can find a cause you feel strongly about, your volunteer work may become a lifelong passion.
12. Get back in touch with old friends.
As you continue through life, you will make new friends and you will lose touch with others.?Even if you haven’t spoken to someone?in ages, go ahead and reach out if they’re special to you. Call them, send an email, write a letter, whatever. When you make an effort to stay in touch and/or get back in touch with people who mean something to you, you always have a reason to smile. You’re giving that person a reason to smile, too.
13. Learn to go with the flow.
Life may not always work out the way you had planned, and that’s OK! There’s no point playing the “what if” game and questioning how your life could’ve turned out differently had you made different choices. Remember that there are no wrong choices in life.?Every choice you make will either lead you to someplace beautiful, or it will show you a place you’ll learn to avoid in the future. Life is beautiful and precious, so don’t sweat it if it doesn’t go as planned. Enjoy it, embrace it, LIVE IT!
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Alecia Pasdera is a recent college graduate from Wisconsin who is currently working as a copy editor in Kentucky. Her academic background is in journalism and communication. Alecia sees a lot of problems with the world today, and although she doesn’t have the power to change them singlehandedly, she does have the power to write about them and raise awareness. It’s her belief that education and knowledge are the strongest tools in making tomorrow a better world for everyone. You can follow her personal blog at allthingsgrowingup.weebly.com.
