Quebec’s Mind-Blowing New Approach To K-12 Schooling!

quebec sex ed schooling
Bill Taverner speaks at the National Sex Ed Conference in 2014. (Photo Credit: Bill Taverner/Wikimedia Commons)

Thinking back on my schooling in Texas, I am reminded of just how sparse talk about human sexuality was.

  • 5th Grade: “You’ll get hair everywhere and your voice will get deeper. Now, here’s a stick of Right Guard and get back to class!”
  • 7th Grade: “Well, some dude bits fit into some girl bits and that’s how babies are made. Oh, and don’t get HIV! It’s bad.”
  • 11th Grade: “Hey, did you hear? [Some guy] and [some girl] are doing it.”

Yup. That’s pretty much the extent of sex ed schooling in Texas. And yet, people are surprised when you tell them Texas has the 3rd-highest rate of teen pregnancy in the United States.

You know, family values and whatnot.

Our never-ending coverage of batshit Texas schooling notwithstanding, when I heard that Quebec is in the process of instituting a mandatory sexual education curriculum, I’ll admit it, I was a bit peeved, though purely in the “my education was bullshit” sense. After all, high teen pregnancy and STD rates are most common in American states that don’t teach sexual education, and the latter made me very paranoid as a chronically-aroused, sense-lacking adolescent surrounded by low-cut tops and skinny jeans.

Needless to say, I think mandatory schooling in human sexuality is a great thing. I support it 100%. Even in Quebec’s case, where the education will conceivably start right after finger painting.

Now, this doesn’t mean that Quebec’s Kindergarten students will be subjected to condom application lessons (a la Mr. Garrison). The presented material will take the pupil’s age into consideration. Documents pertaining to the program suggest that while young children will not be subjected to anything even remotely explicit, elementary school age kids will be taught about adolescence, presumably beyond a stick of deodorant for the boys and a pad for girls. During those formidable high school years, students will be armed with knowledge of intimacy and sexual practices before they binge drink at house parties.

Quebec is looking to succeed where another province, Ontario, had failed. Last year, Ontario rolled out sex ed schooling that resulted in thousands and parents pulling their kids out of class. Quebec’s resolution? No exceptions!

I’m no teacher. Nor am I a concerned parent. But, the way I see it, schooling dumbass kids in sexual health and safety should be mandatory. I agree with the no exceptions ideology. Kids aren’t bright (I know because I used to be one) and they’re always going to find themselves in situations that dramatically increase the likelihood of ass-biting consequences.

Part of the reason places like Texas, Oklahoma, Mississippi, and Alabama have such high rates of pregnancy and STD’s in teens is because of a culture of ignorance. After all, sex before marriage makes God cry and Planned Parenthood murders babies and sells them to Satanists on the Deep Web, right?

It takes two people (in this case two adolescents) to have sex with each other and more often than not, it’s going to happen. It’s not like there’s a switch that turns the impulse off and under low lighting and bed sheets, God doesn’t exist. At the very least, they shouldn’t be ignorant to the wisdom of Confucius (presumably):

“Don’t be a fool; wrap your tool.”

Robert could go on about how he was raised by honey badgers in the Texas Hill Country, or how he was elected to the Texas state legislature as a 19-year-old wunderkind, or how he won 219 consecutive games of Rock 'Em Sock 'Em Robots against Hugh Grant, but those would be lies. However, Robert does hail from Lewisville, Texas, having been transplanted from Fort Worth at a young age. Robert is a college student and focuses his studies on philosophical dilemmas involving morality, which he feels makes him very qualified to write about politicians. Reading the Bible turned Robert into an atheist, a combative disposition toward greed turned him into a humanist, and the fact he has not lost a game of Madden football in over a decade means you can call him "Zeus." If you would like to be his friend, you can send him a Facebook request or follow his ramblings on Twitter. For additional content that may not make it to Liberal America, Robert's internet tavern, The Zephyr Lounge, is always open