The following pictures are real, authentic advertisements that date back to the late 1800s and go all the way up to the early 1970s. Some are racist, some are sexist, and some are just plain weird. If you approach these vintage ads with an open mind and good sense of humor you can actually have fun with them. Best case scenario you laugh until you cry. Worst case scenario you realize how lucky we all are to live in a much more progressive, educated society. Either way you win. Join me on this bizarre trip down memory lane…
1. Ronald Reagan Chesterfield Cigarette Ad, 1952
No unpleasant aftertaste Ron? I wish we could say the same about your presidency.
2. WWII Propaganda Poster, 1943
Good luck agreeing on which radio station to listen to, he can be SO unreasonable.
3. Demure Ad, 1969
Replace “ing” with an “e” and you have yourself a synonym, am I right ladies?
4. Canada Dry Ad, 1938
Well, they’re not wrong.
5. DuPont Sun Lamp, 1960
“Simply lay your child down underneath the DuPont Sun Lamp. Then, all you have to do is set it…and forget it!” *crowd erupts in applause*
6. Reo Cologne Ad, 1977
My question is, how does one determine whether a consumer meets the criteria for buying this cologne??Seems like they’re putting department store clerks in a pretty awkward position here.
7. Mentha Dental Offices Ad, 1900
Alright I’m onto you guys, where’s the hidden cameras? I’m being Punk’d right? This deal is way too good to be true.
8. Iver Johnson Revolvers Ad, 1904
If Iver Johnson AND Papa say it’s safe, you can take that to the bank. Well maybe not the bank…but you get the idea.
9. Bayer Medicinal Heroin Ad, Around 1900
When that aspirin just ain’t cuttin’ it, Bayer knows what you really want.
10. Pears Soap Ad, Early 1900’s
Hey Pears Soap, what the hell am I looking at right now?
11. Pitney-Bowes Ad, 1953
We laugh but you know what the scary part is? Sh*t was so out of whack back then they probably thought this was a legitimate question.
12. Official U.S. Navy Poster, 1942
I don’t endorse racism of any kind, but after Pearl Harbor I understand why the Navy might be a little mad. Let’s not pretend we don’t see cartoons like this of ISIS or Al-Qaeda. Just saying.
13. Radio Free Europe Cold War Ad, 1955
Duh, dude. Who invited this guy anyways? Doesn’t even know what truth dollars are.
14. Ladies Home Journal Yeast Ad, 1934
RIP to that woman’s toilet…never stood a chance.
15. Dr. Williams’ Pink Pills Ad, 1890
Canada Dry kid from earlier would be PUMPED.
16. Atlas Industries Vibra-Finger Ad, 1960
Kind of like the warning on cotton swab boxes telling you not to put them in your ear. You can tell me this is a gum-massager, but we all know what’s going on here.
17. Monsanto Chemicals Ad, 1939
From the fine people over at Monsanto. Yes, that Monsanto.
18. Drummond Sweaters Ad, 1959
Well, Drummond Sweaters, tell us how you really feel.
19. Johnnie Walker Whiskey Ad, 1930’s
So the greatest generation liked to drink their breakfast once in awhile, what’s it to you?
20. Prophylaxis Ad, Date Unknown
Al Capone must have missed this one. Better luck next time big guy.
21. Coca-Cola Ad, 1950’s
Good question Coca-Cola, is it ever really too soon to give an infant more sugar than multiple adults should consume?
22. Palmolive Soap Ad, 1924
“Honey, it’s really unattractive when you think for yourself.” – Men in 1924.
23. Tipalet Cigarettes Ad, 1969
Pretty generous of them to put that in the ad, you should have to pay for advice that good.
24. 7-Up Soda Ad, 1950’s
Alright, enough. What’s the statute of limitations on child abuse? The people at Coke and 7-Up need to be held accountable for this madness.
25. Schlitz Beer Ad, 1952
I wasn’t aware something that’s like 99.9% water could burn. Scientific breakthroughs and great beer, that’s just what Schlitz does.
26. Sega Megadrive Ad, Date Unknown
I have nothing to add. A+ Sega, A+.
27. U.S. Navy Poster, 1918
Serious question: we all know women are allowed to enlist now, but did the Navy come up with a different term for female sailors? Referring to women as “seamen” sounds like a lawsuit waiting to happen, regardless of spelling.
28. Barbasol Deodorant Ad, 1947
Barbasol won’t mind if I start using their slogan right? “Dude, you’ve got a serious case of athletic aroma.” Love it.
29. Thorazine Ad, 1957
120 pounds of elderly rage coming right at you. As Dan Patrick once said, “You can’t stop him, you can only hope to contain him.”
30. Virginia Slims Ad, 1971
If I didn’t know better I’d think Virginia Slims brought Shakespeare back from the dead to write ads for them. No but seriously this is next-level offensive, it’s like they tried to pack as much sexist rhetoric as they could into one ad.
31. Lucky Strike Ad, 1936
Listen, if you had to travel the entire planet in one night giving free sh*t to ungrateful brats, you’d need a cigarette too.
32. Chlorine Kilacold Bomb Ad, 1920’s
And you thought it was just an extremely toxic chemical for when your little cousin pees in the pool…HA!
33. Aunt Jemima Pancake Mix Ad, 1940’s
True story. They had an “Aunt Jemima” back in the day that would travel around doing public speaking events and demonstrations. They made her stay in character the whole time. Not even kidding. Look it up.
34. Popular Science Article, 1932
Go ahead, try to find one flaw in filling your car with exhaust fumes. You can’t.
35. Tape Worm Diet Ad, 1900’s
Let me get this straight: these parasitic worms will live inside me eating all the bad crap coming down the chute, AND they’re easy to swallow? Sign me up.
Well folks, that’s our show. Don’t spend all those truth dollars in one place, you’ll want some for a rainy day.
