Brock Turner has already been through a lot. His drunken shenanigans behind a dumpster, two non-Americans tackling him, and his lap times going down due to the lack of practice. Let’s go easy on him and send him to his parents. Maybe make him wear a silly hat and face the corner.
At least that’s what Judge Aaron Persky thought. Because a 6-year jail sentence would have a “negative effect” on Turner.
Such a considerate judicial system we have.

Turner pleaded guilty for three felony charges: Assault with intent to commit rape against an intoxicated/unconscious person, penetration of an intoxicated person, and penetration of an unconscious person.
Unfortunately for Turner, a few annoying people have taken it upon themselves to stand outside Turner’s parents’ house in Sugarcreek Township, a suburb of Dayton, Ohio.
Oh, and they’re also armed with a bunch of firearms and some highly suggestive signs for the Turner family and our American system.
brock turner has the best neighbors pic.twitter.com/kECzPMagWh
— antonio from tw*tter (@antoniodelotero) September 4, 2016
Some truly concerned neighbors are holding peaceful protests with guns in Turner’s neighborhood because Ohio is an open-carry state. They’re also giving highly useful recommendations like “castrate all rapists,” while some are posing some peculiar queries such as:
“If I rape Brock I will only do 3 months?”
Are you a swimmer with awesome lap record? If no then you’re out of luck, bud.
#BrockTurner may have gotten a light sentence but the neighbors not making it easy for him to live outside of jail pic.twitter.com/k4DXAF7AY2
— coke (@wildd_child) September 3, 2016
After Turner’s recent relocation to his parents’ basement, he has five days to register as a sex offender with Greene County’s authorities in Ohio.
He is also required to re-register every 90 days. So strenuous. Thankfully, postcards will be sent to neighboring residents notifying them about the sex-offender who has recently shifted into their neighborhood.
Protestors spelling out "RAPIST" in front of #BrockTurner Ohio home. pic.twitter.com/YcFo1bq8dr
— Lisa Rantala (@rantalawsyx) September 2, 2016
Let’s hope the Turners throw a house-warming party once the postcards are delivered. Just don’t leave your daughters or moms or dogs near a trash can. Turner has an affinity towards taking dumpster diving the wrong way.
Featured Image: Screenshot Via Twitter.