Scott Walker…Yeah, He Isn’t Gonna Be President, Either, And Here’s Why

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So Wisconsin Governor Scott Walker is going to announce his formal entrance into the 2016 race for the GOP nomination on Monday. Some pundits will tell you that he has the best chance of possibly snatching the nomination away from presumptive frontrunner Jeb Bush. But I ain’t buying all the snake oil that’s being sold right now.

Don’t get me wrong. I think Walker will appeal to a lot of Republican primary voters. He likes to quote the Bible and pretend he believes in Christian ideals, but of course that’s just a lot of bunk that he uses to delude people into thinking he has a soul.

But Walker has some major strikes against him, and here’s just a few of the most recent ones that come to mind:

He Cannot Win His Home State

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Everyone who thinks Walker carries Wisconsin running against any Democratic nominee doesn’t realize how unpopular this guy is in his own state. Also, Wisconsin leans Democratic. Losing your home state is not the way to win a national election. Don’t believe me, go ask Al Gore.

He Just Wrote Off The Women’s Vote

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In May, Walker signed a bill which made it illegal for a woman in Wisconsin to obtain an abortion after 20 weeks, even if the pregnancy is the result of rape or incest. How does he defend that policy to women? He can’t, and therefore it will be used as a cudgel to prove he is beholden to religious extremists.

He Has Terrible Record On Education

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In January, Walker and his GOP minions in the state legislature cut $300 million from the University of Wisconsin system. Imagine the attack ad aimed at parents and students that is gonna make.

He’s An Inveterate Liar

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Yes, yes, I know all politicians lie. But this guy lies when there is no need. He has said the reason he has a bald spot on the back of his head is because his wife left a drawer out and he raised up and hit his head on the drawer. No, Governor, you’re going bald because you are genetically predisposed to it. If he will lie about something so insignificant, what won’t he lie about?

Walker Is A Douchey Weasel Who Makes People Uncomfortable

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Have you noticed how ill-at-ease he seems in front of a group of people? It’s almost like he’s a robot and cannot quite comprehend how humans react. This is also the same guy who declared that he has the most foreign policy experience of any Republican candidate because he’s been to six countries. I’ve been to 10, but I don’t think that qualifies me to be leader of the free world.

So welcome to the Show, Governor Walker. It’s gonna be fun watching you implode.

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