Whiny Loser Donald Trump Blames Debate Performance On ‘Defective Mic’

Instead of admitting that he lost–and badly–in last night’s Presidential debate, Donald Trump has found a new excuse to explain why he did so poorly:

“And they also had, gave me a defective mic. Did you notice that? My mic was defective within the room. No, but I wonder, was that on purpose? Was that on purpose? But I had a mic that wasn’t worked properly, with, working properly within the room.”

Yep, he managed to make a half-assed excuse for his low-energy, angry, and defensive performance. Blame it all on the microphone. And yet, had Trump’s mic not even been turned on, the bizarre expressions on his face, the way he gesticulated with his incredibly small hands, and his leaning forward when that wasn’t necessary would have told you all you needed to know about how bad Trump was last night.

The first 30 minutes of so of the debate, Trump made some decent points and performed passably, though the constant sniffing he engaged in made it sound like Snuffleupagus had taken control of the podium and was standing in for the Orange Menace.

But as the debate reached the halfway point, and especially the last 30 minutes of the evening, Trump was incoherent and didn’t answer a single question he was asked by the moderator. It was as if Trump had just remembered he had an important meeting and was going to be late if he didn’t hurry through his responses.

For the next debate, perhaps we can give Trump a bullhorn and let him see if that suits him. Or we can just invite Snuffleupagus himself and ask him to perform some of those neato tricks he can do with his trunk.

Featured Image Via Screengrab